Agony

The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.
2 Peter 3:9

In accordance with my New Testament reading plan, I just finished reading 2 Peter. There were several verses in chapters 2 & 3 that struck a very profound note with me.

Lately I have felt a heavy weight on my soul; I know that it is for all the loved ones in my life who are running from the Lord. Chapter 2 of 2 Peter warns against the teachings of false teachers, and false teachers are running rampant in our society today. It's nearly impossible to avoid their influence. From politicians, to talk show hosts, to televangelists, to people we know personally, there is always someone whispering in our ears. Of course, the most common false doctrines are exactly what Peter warns of in verses 18-19:

For when they speak great swelling words of emptiness, they allure through the lusts of the flesh, through lewdness, the ones who have actually escaped from those who live in error. While they promise them liberty, they themselves are slaves of corruption; for by whom a person is overcome, by him also he is brought into bondage.

The human mind is weak, and false teachers constantly prey on that weakness. They are quick to make everyone feel good; they tell everyone that they are "entitled," they make the human being #1. And let's face it, everyone wants to be #1. It's an easy sell: "You're okay; everything's okay; you won't be challenged or convicted if you follow me." So even people who have heard the truth are sucked back in, ignoring the Good News of freedom and engaging in the bondage of carnal lusts.

But it has happened to them according to the true proverb: "A dog returns to his own vomit"..."
2 Peter 2:22

Please do not misread this post. I am not judging or condemning anyone; my heart just aches for the wandering souls in my life. It positively aches. But praise God for this:

The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.
2 Peter 3:9

He waited for me for many difficult years, and I pray He will wait for all my loved ones too.

Hot, Steamy Goodness

Bo, Jack, and I all have a cold. It is a strange cold; it doesn't bring much in the way of nasal congestion. Instead, it brings on a scratchy throat, headache, and a cough. Fever is optional. I just went into the kitchen to feed Jack lunch, and I was looking for something to eat myself, but I have no appetite. One thing did appeal to me though: I nice, hot cup of tea. If you ask me, there is nothing better for a sore throat, and it warms me up from the inside out. Not to mention that green tea has some caffeine in it (yay!).

Mmmmm...soothing...

It's Cold.

I don't much care what anyone else has to say on the subject: to me, 42 degrees = cold.

I know it's probably a bit early to be whining about it, but I am going to go ahead and do so anyway: I am over the whole "winter" thing. I honestly didn't expect moving to Virginia to be too much of an adjustment, but I think I was majorly spoiled by the easy Texas winters.

Not only am I sick of the cold weather, I am also sick of dry skin, sweaters, freezing cold feet, and the sound of scraping ice!!!! WORST. SOUND. EVER. Only to be rivaled by the sound of creaking/crunching snow. I shiver just thinking about it. It actually makes me feel nauseous.

Honestly, I applaud those of you who are brave enough to live in the frigid North. I cannot imagine how cold your toes must be.

I was born in Michigan and lived there until I was 8. I then lived in Connecticut for 4 years, so I have experienced the whole "long, cold, snowy winter" thing...but that was a long time ago. And apparently my tolerance for cold has decreased by at least 75%.

Of course I have romanticized memories of snow: sledding with my sisters down steep, death-trap embankments; walking to the school bus stop in a blizzard; etc.

But I seriously doubt I could tolerate a winter any colder than this. Anywhere north of Virginia and I would surely perish.

Relief

You know that feeling when you've been gone a long time and you get home and you just feel so relieved and happy that it almost makes you cry? You sit on your couch and you can't imagine anything better; you close your eyes and take a deep breath. That is how I feel when I think about heaven.

I was in the car today and MercyMe's song "Homesick" came on the radio. The song is about being homesick for heaven, and that is exactly how I feel. I can't wait to feel the sweet relief of relaxing in eternal paradise with the Lord. How amazing will that be? No worries, no stress, just endless opportunities to praise God. I cannot wait.

Homesick Lyrics:
You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know
But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same
Cause I'm still here so far away from home
[ Find more Lyrics at www.mp3lyrics.org/8PJC ]

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbye
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
To see you again
To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

Waiting

Waiting is the hardest part.
Every day I have thoughts of impatience:
"God, please get Bo a new job."
"I cannot wait to move out of this house."
"I feel like such a loser, being 25 years old and living with my parents."
"God, please get us a house of our own."
"Everyone else we know owns a home or at least lives on there own. We are such losers."
"We are never going to get out of here."
"I feel so helpless. So hopeless."

I need to be reminded constantly that things are never hopeless--our hope lies in Jesus. I'll wait on Him, but I need Him to give me the patience to wait. I definitely don't have it in me, only in Him.

So I'll wait on Him.

hungry I come to You
for I know You satisfy
I am empty
but I know Your love does not run dry
and I wait
and I wait
so I wait for You
so I wait for You

I'm falling on my knees
offering all of me
Jesus, You're all this heart is living for

broken I run to You
for Your arms are open wide
I am weary but I know Your touch restores my life
so I'll wait for You
so I'll wait for You

I'm falling on my knees
offering all of me
Jesus, You're all this heart is living for
Oh, I'm falling on my knees
offering all of me
Jesus, You're all this heart is living for

and I wait for you
and I wait for you
and I wait for you
and I wait

I'm falling on my knees
offering all of me
Jesus, You're all this heart is living for
Oh, I'm falling on my knees
offering all of me
Jesus, You're all this heart is living for

hungry I come to you,
for I know You satisfy

("Hungry (Falling On My Knees)" by Kara)